another bad couple of days

Im exhausted
and wonder how on earth I will get work done ..Pete had a pretty good recovery after  the head swelling thing

then another whammy yesterday .his heart
in the early hours he woke ..then woke me ..cut a long story short
I rushed him into hospital ..again
his heart is beating way to fast and has gone out of rhythm..its either the Chemo or an underlying heart defect that has just reared its head

Im floored ..just floored ..he hasnt bounced back at all from this and is still in bed
the Demons came to vistit me in the night and left me scarred and worried sick about the future

I cry a lot ..its like being a child again ..I want my husband back to normal ..I want our life back

then an old friend phoned me this morning
he gave me my fight back

"Carrie Attwood let something hurt her Pete ..its not gonna happen"
and he is right
Im going to bitch slap that cow back to were it came from


Im not letting C use up all my energy crying and worrying about what could happen


I have work to do ..a house to run and a bussiness to keep going

and more than anything I have to love and care for my husband ..who is the most wonderful person I have ever known 
and Im going to do it so Im not going to waist any more time blubbering today

today were at home 

tommorow all day hospital
everything I have read about Cancer ..to beat it is an up hill battle ..but its going to have to battle if it wants to take my Pete

3 comments:

Roachport M said...

Bless you dear, and fight on!

Anonymous said...

You go and beat the c*** out of that illness! We're all rooting for you and Pete.

Your hubbie is lucky to have such strong support in you, and so much love. So he's got the best possible foundation to get through this.

Hugs,
Mikka (Keladry)

tinybear said...

thank you both xx
you hve no idea how much these comments help xx