another day and Pete is still ill
last Wednesday and Thursday he looked so well ...and then wham !
he just has no energy at all ..his head is fuzzy ...and there is that little cough ..that he hasn't noticed ...but I have
and my heart sinks ..
so I go through the motions of living ..whilst he is upstairs sleeping ..
Im downstairs
washing up ..ironing ..hovering ..all the things he has always done
I miss him so much just being by me ..and I hate him being so ill
and its very hard to stay focused and positive and get my work done
but tomorrow we will see his surgeon ..and I am thinking of talking to Tracy ..I have that scream caught in my throat again
..so I write it down here instead of screaming
every day on Facebook I put what makes me smile ...every day something has to make me smile ..
because I am scarred of loosing me
Pete always says Im always laughing and always smileing
no..... he says I would laugh if my fanny was on fire ...LOL
but its bloody hard to do it some days ...but if I dont ..then I am gone ..and this sad me is here ...and Pete dosnt need that sad me ...he needs me
so I smile
this week Im sorting out the delayed wigs
and the Etsy custom orders
Ebay sales ...Im waiting for the bubble wrap to come then they will go out too
last Wednesday and Thursday he looked so well ...and then wham !
he just has no energy at all ..his head is fuzzy ...and there is that little cough ..that he hasn't noticed ...but I have
and my heart sinks ..
so I go through the motions of living ..whilst he is upstairs sleeping ..
Im downstairs
washing up ..ironing ..hovering ..all the things he has always done
I miss him so much just being by me ..and I hate him being so ill
and its very hard to stay focused and positive and get my work done
but tomorrow we will see his surgeon ..and I am thinking of talking to Tracy ..I have that scream caught in my throat again
..so I write it down here instead of screaming
every day on Facebook I put what makes me smile ...every day something has to make me smile ..
because I am scarred of loosing me
Pete always says Im always laughing and always smileing
no..... he says I would laugh if my fanny was on fire ...LOL
but its bloody hard to do it some days ...but if I dont ..then I am gone ..and this sad me is here ...and Pete dosnt need that sad me ...he needs me
so I smile
this week Im sorting out the delayed wigs
and the Etsy custom orders
Ebay sales ...Im waiting for the bubble wrap to come then they will go out too
5 comments:
You're so brave for him. I keep you both in my thoughts and send a lot of wishes your way...
Sending prayers and positive thoughts for Pete and big hugs for you.
~~Lin
Connie,
I wish I could hold you in my arms and take all your pain and sorrow away. I wish I could lay my hand on your beloved hubby and make him well. My heart aches for you. I send you my love.
Janie from the US
And dammit, I meant Carrie.
Janie
Carrie you must stay positive for him, cheerie and strong. It gives him somthing special, a positive energy of some kind...
I am being ill for a while now and know how important it is- the positive smile.
Post a Comment