so close to finishing her
just cant wait to get away for a few days
Pete is recovering slowly ..so very slowly ..sometimes I think I may loose my mind
this journey we are on is a nightmare ...I just dream of a happy ending
we are due to see the specialist tommorow to find out what treatment he is to ahve next and the last ct scans
part of me is terrified
he has 8 lesions or nodules on his body now ..lord knows whats going on in his lungs and I am scarred shitless :(
I am doing everything I can ,...research into diet and latest complimentary treatments , I spend hours reading about diet and cancers
the McMillan nurse from Birmingham gave Kat an amazing magazine to read ICON
its eye-opening ..there are things we can do to help ..that can be used along side the radiotherapy and conventional treatments
and the future of treatments ..
it kinda keeps me sane at least I feel I have some control over this too
latest inside the Moo
lola
Ive missed my little girl the past couple of weeks
when I havent been in the hospital with Pete ..Ive been up the vets with Chester
Chester may have a heart defect ..at the moment his heart is raceing way too fast and he has a heart murmur
so he is going to be refered to a specialist
Pete has been discharged from the hospital , his radiotherapy is finished ..we wont know if its worked for 4 weeks ..he has to have a 3 week break from treatment then back to Dr Grummit to see if the Chemo worked at all and sort out the rest of the tumours
either Chemotherapy or something else ..dont know what that is
Ive sent out a load of orders this week and I should be getting back to normal and catching up with backdated orders this week
tiny Romeo
I carried him about in my pocket all day last week
sewing up bits as and when I could so Pete wouldn't know I was making him
he is tiny ..and I love this size ...
every day this week when we go to hospital I sit and sew ..or knit
its been a long week ..and Im out of the house more than Im in
Ive not got around to posting anything ...but I am planning on parcelling up over the weekend so I can post Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday
I managed to make up quite a lot last weekend ..but just Havant got to get them out yet
Ive had 3 dolls arrive ...Hujoo ABS ted ..who is still bald , nude and face-less ..Customhouse SD chow who is still a box of bits
and Cherish doll ltd rick ..still nude and the same state as the others ..but it was a nice suprise
Pete is doing Ok ...so far so good ..no side effects ..nothing else nasty cropping up
and 3 of the first tumours on his body that came up have shrunk ..
so were hopeful once he starts his treatment again ..we can give this illness a run for its money !!
he is just exhausted ..he cant sleep ..steroids most likely
I wish I could just magic it away
but life isnt like that is it?
were planning the day again today ...1.30 appointment
so it takes about an hour to get there
parking is a nightmare ..so Im leaving at 12.15
fill up with fuel ..and off I go
now Im answereing the e.mails I have had come in
THISTLEDOWN ...again !!
10 days worth ..every day doing a 2 hour round trip plus the hospital time
Im still working ..taking orders and working on new stock for my Etsy
but if you have e.mailed me ..it may be a few days before I can invoice you or get back to you
I know Im going to be majorly stressed out the next 10 days
were not sleeping too well right now
but I know its all going to come right in the end
Ive enjoyed myself today photographing the new bears ..Pete helped me with them too ..fastening off cotterpins ...my hands are still very weak ..and all the driving Im doing over the next 10 days and the sewing Im doing ...he dosnt want me to knacker them up
but its taken my mind off things a little ...
and ROMEO ..finished for a wonderful £102.00 !
MacMillan Charity bear
these past couple of weeks have dragged
Pete is looking really well ..but not knowing when he is going to have the treatment is killing me
Not sleeping too well ..and not resting
just wish we would get the letter
Tracey called yesterday and told us he Dr Zachariha has just got back from his holiday and Pete is first on the list ..we should know something by tommorow
at least sewing my bears is helping ..I always used to be creative when stressed ...
so this is Romeo ..it was going to be Mac ..but hey ..its February
and Im feeling a little low and nostalgic
Pete always did have the key to my heart ..so this is for him
my Romeo ..
looking forward to happier days xx
Precious
..LOL Pete again ..when I made Milli ...he was ..like
can you make one smaller ..so I have
and I loved making her ...I think you can tell ..when you are enjoying something ..it shows
and these new bears ..Im loveing
Milli
Milli finished at a wonderful £103.00
Im working on her brother now ..Mac
who will go up for auction February for MacMillan Cancer Support
Hospital every day
they have cut down on the heart tablets ..the side effects are lousy ..he is exhausted
but his heart has slowed down and no more palpitations
trouble is they make his head ache and he feels giddy and nauseous
and as he is on steroids for the head pain ...its like giving you something in one hand then taking it away
back to the Hospital again today
they have said he has to have weekly blood tests at our own Drs ..so hopefully the daily trips to hospital will stop
the weekend I will parcel everything up and ship it out Saturday , Monday and Tuesday xx
another bad couple of days
and wonder how on earth I will get work done ..Pete had a pretty good recovery after the head swelling thing
then another whammy yesterday .his heart
in the early hours he woke ..then woke me ..cut a long story short
I rushed him into hospital ..again
his heart is beating way to fast and has gone out of rhythm..its either the Chemo or an underlying heart defect that has just reared its head
Im floored ..just floored ..he hasnt bounced back at all from this and is still in bed
the Demons came to vistit me in the night and left me scarred and worried sick about the future
I cry a lot ..its like being a child again ..I want my husband back to normal ..I want our life back
then an old friend phoned me this morning
he gave me my fight back
"Carrie Attwood let something hurt her Pete ..its not gonna happen"
and he is right
Im going to bitch slap that cow back to were it came from
Im not letting C use up all my energy crying and worrying about what could happen
everything I have read about Cancer ..to beat it is an up hill battle ..but its going to have to battle if it wants to take my Pete
Bracken
well I have finally managed to get them listed on Ebay
http://stores.ebay.com/thesleepingelf
£10.00 fro every sale will go to MacMillan Cancer Support
both Pete and I are thrilled with how Milli is going
and so far this week I have raised £40.00 from other sales too
Pete is much better today ..his head is still hurting ..and the med he is on is making him drowsy ..but a far cry from Thursday
3 of the other nodes on his body are shrinking ..so we are optimistic
thats its working
the scan next week will tell us if it is ..if it is ..they will put him on steroids untill the Chemo has done its work ..
but today ..its not a bad day for us at all xx
UPDATE
he has been doing so amazingly well ...but this week he started feeling a bit fuzzy headed and had flu like symptoms
which can happen on this drug he is on
god it was terrible ...he was in agony ..scarred me shitless
His doctor thinks the chemotherapy either bought on a mother of a migraine
in which case it will be gone tommorow
or the drug is making the brain swell ..either that or the cancer has reached the brain
after a whole day of agony ..steroids ..injections to stop him being sick ..by evening he was getting slightly better ..and had stopped being sick
if its a migraine ..he will be Ok in 24hrs
if its the Chemo drug ..on the steroids and anti-sickness drugs he will be better in 48 hrs
if its on his brain ...he wont
so we came home ..exhausted
were booked in for a scan next week ... and the results will be through quickly as his Chemo is on hold .he cant have it again untill they find out if has cancer on his brain ..the chemo will be stopped and he will have radiotherapy
..it has been a lousy 24hrs ..
Milli
and here she is
I feel quite emotional about her ...she was a labour of love
for someone I love ..
without him ..I would have never have been who I am today
this was Pete`s brainchild ...and is for him xx
100% will go to MacMillan Cancer Support
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=320638632897&ssPageName=STRK:MESELX:IT#ht_1810wt_1139
its cold outside !
so far today its not stopped snowing ..
the roads are appalling ...nothing is going nowhere
Were snuggled up in home ..log fire glowing and Yankie Candles burning
Christmas TV on ..kids are at friends ..and its lovely
going to make Pete some Vege - low fat low sugar mince pies LOL
I feel quite festive ..
The snow is falling thick and fast
and dont care as long as we can get to the hospital Monday for Petes second lot of Chemo .
.I have a 4x4 so we should be OK
looks like the only things moving today are the 4x4s
Im finishing this weeks wigs to go out Tuesday ...our post is diabolical right now ..and post has slowed right down
so I dont expect anything else to arrive before Christmas
update
light at the end of the tunnel
Im exhausted I out of the house more times than Im in ...I havent got much done this week at all
but everyone who is waiting for an order now ..it will be shipped next week ..Pete is comming out of hospital tommorow and although he is still in bed ..I shall be working from home ...so I can look after him and get the wigs done and the dolls out
thank you everyone for bearing with me xx
away from the Pc
every couple of days
thank you everyone who is preying ..sending healing Vibes and wishing us well
it means so much to me ..to us ..thank you
especially Ragna ..she has kept me focused
and Jean ,she has been my rock
Pete is in Hospital ..the operation went well ..were hopeing now to get the results of the Cat scan
but he is well ..eating chocolate ..thats my Man ..and I love him for it
and he wants to get back hope to the Van ...
APRIL ..TOTNES ! we have it planned
on the way...
all of the dolls were sent out Friday ..and I have all the addresses and wig orders printed off for next week ..those will go out by the end of this week
so if your waiting for a wig order ...next week
we have had 2 beautiful Autumn weekends ..Pete is healing well ..we can manage a short walk ...so we do
Im hoping we get one more ..beautiful day next Sunday ..although Pete has to phone
the Hospital Sunday to book his bed for Monday ..then he has to have his operation
1 more weekend this Autumn would be nice ..because he is going to be off his feet for 6-8 weeks
He has his pre-op Monday ...MRI Thursday ...then phone Sunday ..in Monday
I dont think Im going to be totally happy until its out of him and we get the results back from the Scan ...and we know what were up against
but every day we live it to its fullest ...we are dressing the house up next week for Halloween :)
Its not going to beat us !
another day ....
felling a bit low today ..everything fells like its moving so slowly ..yet its not ..not really
we got the appointment 21st ..for a Cat scan , hbut no news yet on the operation
if the second letter isnt with us by Monday Im phoneing
I thought I would post Gina here ..the picture makes me smile ..anything to make us smile right now
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For anyone who has been waiting for me to contact them I am using Petes laptop Pete has been given days to live ..he is desperately poor...
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https://sleepingelf.etsy.com/ Can’t believe it’s been so long , this year has flown by , dramatic fall , lots of scans and hospital, amazi...